#ian

In eternity there is no time, only an instant long enough for a joke. ↗

— Hermann Hesse

#discordianism #eternity #humor #joke #humor

Across the room, she heard a loud clatter. She looked up to see that Roland ahd fallen out of his chair. The last time she'd glanced at him, he'd been leaning back on tw legs, and now it looked like gravity had finally won. As he stumbled to his feet, Arriane went to help him. She glanced over and offered a hurried wave. "He's okay!" she called cheerily. "Get up!" she whispered loudly to Roland. ↗

— Lauren Kate

#roland-humor #humor

Reyna looked at Percy without much hope. “You do have a plan?” Percy wanted to step forward bravely and say, No, I don’t! ↗

— Rick Riordan

#percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #plans #reyna #the-heroes-of-olympus

That's it...I'm completely giving up on boys and concentrating on staying alive. ↗

— Samantha Young

#love-triangles #romance #humor

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. ↗

— Edith Sitwell

#i #i wish #incompetent #pianos #put

...Fate forced me to become a two-man woman. But there was no effing way I could be a four-man woman. Even metaphysics couldn't keep that from being whorey. ↗

— Sierra Dean

#love-triangles #sexuality #humor

Too many OB/GYN’s aren’t able to practice their love with women all across the country. ↗

— George W. Bush

#humor #lesbian-doctor #love #obgyn #humor

The satisfying sound of bone giving way, as well as his outraged cry, made the you-had-it-coming-asshole angles sing. ↗

— J.A. Saare

#humor #ja-saare #renfield-syndrome #rhiannon #rhiannon-s-laws

I know a flute player is technically called a "flautist," but something about it sounds a little sketchy, as does "pianist," so I will refrain. ↗

— Julie Halpern

#flautist #flute #geek #humor #music

I had made her so unhappy that she had developed a sense of humor. [-Rabo Karabekian] ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#rabo-karebekian #wife #wives #humor