#jocks

It's not just the cheerleading thing I have a problem with, it's the whole jock enchilada. I'm all for a good game of basketball in teh driveway or a killer bike ride. But when there's tackling and grunting involved-- no thanks. ↗

— Linda Ellerbee

#jocks #kid-s-books #funny

I quickly, swiftly, reach in, pluck out, and peer into the mirror. 'I am still here.' I am in the glass, in this moment. After this moment, I may not be here; I may be a person who does not know where she is, or why. I leave the kitchen table to bathe, and to dress for church. If only my closet held on its shelves an array of faces I could wear rather than dresses, I would know which face to put on today. As for the dresses, I haven't a clue. ↗

— Tim Cummings

#afterlife #astrology #brothers #children-of-celebrities #class-struggle

While some of my closest friends were jocks, it seemed that they spoke a different language with each other. Joining in their conversation was fraught with risk. ↗

— Mo Rocca

#closest friends #conversation #different #different language #each

I played baseball in college but I didn't identify with the jocks, I was in my own little world . ↗

— Nicholas Brendon

#college #i #identify #jocks #little

To be or not to be tethered to the sordid, sickly, stinking, sappy apron strings of Hollywood and its endless fondness for fu**ing your sh** up. If Shakespeare were alive today, I bet he’d write a scintillating soliloquy about the Broken Brood of Big Shots. I bet he’d help you out, Micky Affias, ol’ Will the Bard would. Listen, we’ll come visit you. Okay? I’ll dress up as William Shakespeare, Lucent as Emily Dickinson, and beautiful ‘Ray’ as someone dashing and manly like Jules Verne or Ernest Hemingway, and we’ll write on your white-room walls. We’ll write you out of your supposed insanity. I love you, Micky Affias. -James (from "Descendants of the Eminent") ↗

— Tim Cummings

#afterlife #astrology #brothers #children-of-celebrities #class-struggle

Respect doesn’t have to be shiny. It just needs to be wearable. Would you be so kind as to hold my jockstrap while I stir your hot coffee?
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#coffee #funny #hold #humor #jockstrap

Amy! Sit correctly, you are wearing a dress...feet on the floor and your knees together girl...You are trying to catch a husband, not flies ! ↗

— Amy Mah

#teenagers #teens-sex-awkward-jocks #vampire #teen

As much as I think about sex, I can only with extreme difficulty conceive of myself actually performing the act. And here's another thing I wonder about. How could you ever look a girl in the eye after you've had your winkie up her wendell? I mean, doesn't that render normal social conversation impossible? Apparently not. ↗

— C.D. Payne

#satire #sex #teens #teens-sex-awkward-jocks #humor

When I was ten all I knew was that I hated the weird words used to describe whatever it was that was wrong with my brother—to this day I think it all happened because he was overtaken by evil spirits that got loose in that haunted house ride at the carnival that summer. It’s easier for me to make sense of it that way than it is for me to face the other way—reality. And yet, those evil spirits that were unleashed—be they fake entities from a stupid carnival ride, or cruel malevolencies from dark spiritual chasms of our universe—have stayed with me all these years ↗

— Tim Cummings

#afterlife #astrology #brothers #children-of-celebrities #class-struggle

Jocks usually aren't smart. Their muscles feast on their brains. ↗

— Katie McGarry

#humor #jocks #humor