#lifeguard

I’m a lifeguard at a brewery. When someone falls in a vat, I jump in after them and start gulping. It makes me feel good after letting people drown. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #lifeguards #funny

When there's an attractive lifeguard on duty I always drown at least twice. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #lifeguards #funny

The problem with the gene pool is that there's no lifeguard. ↗

— David Gerrold

#lifeguard #pool #problem

My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash. ↗

— Henny Youngman

#car #lifeguard #wash

If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning. ↗

— Simon Cowell

#duties #good #lifeguard #lot #people

The first two pictures I did, I played a young student in prep school. When I did Lifeguard, everyone was saying, You're so Southern California. It was a surprise to me. ↗

— Parker Stevenson

#did #everyone #first #i #lifeguard