#mo

The first thing she told me after I hit on her was that she had a boyfriend of nine months, and I thought, what kind of sick bitch dates infants? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #dating

Tracy and I were among the few girls left in our class who hadn't made it to the table as Todd's girl of the moment. I'd never had the desire to be part of their demented version of Noah's Ark, where you could only survive if you were paired up with a member of the opposite sex. If I had to choose between dating Todd and missing the boat, I was fully prepared to drown. ↗

— Elizabeth Eulberg

#dating

As a purely mathematical fact, people who sleep less live more. ↗

— Amy Chua

#humor

He is funny,” a nymph ventured. “And cute, in a scrawny way,” another said. “Scrawny?” Leo asked. “Baby, I invented scrawny. Scrawny is the new sizzling hot . And I GOT the scrawny. Narcissus? He’s such a loser even the Underworld didn’t want him. He couldn’t get the ghost girls to date him.” “Eww,” said a nymph. “Eww!” Echo agreed. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#dating

Without causality in the world, there is no point in educating people, or making any moral or political appeal. ↗

— Felix Alba-Juez

#philosophy #science #education

…but because they felt the neighborhood was safer than the one around Columbia, the medical campus of which was so far north that it was practically an annex of the Bronx ↗

— Michelle Au

#nyc #education

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single girl of high standing at Longbourn Academy must be in want of a prom date. ↗

— Elizabeth Eulberg

#humor #paraphrased #parody #dating

Most of the funeral stuff is going to be done during daylight hours,” I said. “I’m not even going to be able to attend the burial. Humans get upset when vampires burst into flames right next to them. ↗

— Molly Harper

#humor #vampire #dating

There was a family joke that Lucy's first words were, "Nicholas is bugging me! ↗

— Alyxandra Harvey

#lucy #solange #family

Before the child ever gets to school it will have received crucial, almost irrevocable sex education and this will have been taught by the parents, who are not aware of what they are doing. ↗

— Mary Calderone

#aware #been #before #child #crucial