#mo

My feelings for you run very deep." - Loor Not deep enought, I guess." - Bobby (The Rivers of Zadaa) ↗

— D.J. MacHale

#humor #humor

God save me from idealists. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#idealism #thomas-raith #humor

God, you’re sexy when you talk Psy.”--Lucas to Sascha ↗

— Nalini Singh

#humor #nalini-singh #paranormal-romance #humor

So, Beav, tell me about yourself." "I'm Blue." "Sweetheart, if I had your dubious taste in men, I wouldn't be too happy, either." "My name is Blue. Blue Bailey. ↗

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#humore #natural-born-charmer #romance #susan-elizabeth-phillips #humor

Life is tough, then you die. ↗

— George Carlin

#reality #humor

Being told when to shit, shower, shave, eat, and sleep isn't my idea of paradise. But then again, Paradise, where i grew up, wasn't paradise either. I'm wondering if paradise is just some word in the dictionary with the definition: this doesn't fucking exist. --Caleb to himself ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humor

Wouldn't it be better if the Elves would just shut up and go away? Hey, what if they stopped throwing a fit at you walking across their backyard. It's not like you ate their tulips or dug holes in their lawn. You didn't piss on any trees when I wasn't looking, did you?" The thundercloud that had darkened his face broke apart. He laughed. "I would have if I'd thought about it. ↗

— Thea Harrison

#humor

You want useless, you have come to the right guy. I can be useless for hours at a time. Weeks even. I'm currently closing in on a month of being totally useless, which is by way of being a personal best. ↗

— Sarah Rees Brennan

#personality #humor

All sins are forgiven once you start making a lot of money. ↗

— RuPaul

#money #past #present #sins #thought

An old battleax of a woman said to Winston Churchill, "If you were my husband I would put poison in your tea." Churchill's response, "Ma'am if you were my wife I would drink it. ↗

— Winston Churchill

#humor #humour #retort #humor