#mo

Leo,” Hazel gasped, “I can’t—my arms—” “Hazel,” he said. “Do you trust me?” “No!” “Me neither,” Leo admitted. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #leo-i-love-you-ok #lol #trust #funny

I always pass on good advice, it is the only thing to do with it.It is never of any use to oneself. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor #humor

When she absently worried her bottom lip with one of her adorable little fangs, he sighed. The Enemy of Old fucking sighed. Dear gods, it’d finally happened to him. Happiness. Then his own fangs sharpened.I will kill anyone who tries to take this feeling away from me. ↗

— Kresley Cole

#funny #happiness #immortals-after-dark #kresley-cole #lothaire

The dark prince sat astride his black steed, his sable cape flowing behind him. A golden circlet bound his blond locks, his handsome face was cold with the rage of battle, and... "And his arm looked like an eggplant," Clary muttered to herself in exasperation. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#funny #mortal-instruments #simon-lewis #funny

This is America. We’re entitled to our opinions.” “Wrong. This is Texas. And my opinion is the only one that counts. ↗

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#arrogant #call-me-irresistible #funny #humour #sep

There were no windows in my bedroom, so I had to sit up and read my clock to figure out how angry I should be at my visitor. Eight A.M. I hated whoever woke me up. Had they come an hour earlier, I would have also hated their families and any household pets. ↗

— Lish McBride

#humor #family

The biggest challenge after success is shutting up about it. ↗

— Criss Jami

#arrogance #arrogant #boasting #bragging #challenges

Xxxx xxxx x xxxx, xxxxx xxx x xxx xxx x xxxx. Xxxx xxxx xxxx x xxxxx xxxx xx Xxxxxxx. ↗

— Pseudonymous Bosch

#funny #humor #nonsense #pseudonymous #the-name-of-this-book-is-secret

Who knew hitting my head and passing out would be so much fun? ↗

— P.C. Cast

#funny #humor #marked #funny

We rode the merry-go-round like a couple of lovers. We weren’t though; we were just two horse enthusiasts from two different worlds (I think she was from Mars).
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #fun-absurd #funny #horses #humor