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Usually my form of turning someone down was shoving a stake through his heart while smirking, Gotcha!


Jeaniene Frost


#paranormal #romance #humor

Niall had been able to mask the odor of fairy from Eric in the restaurant, but I saw from the flare of Eric's nostrils that the intoxicating scent clung to me. Eric's eyes closed in ecstasy, and he actually licked his lips. I felt like a T-bone just out of reach of a hungry dog. "Snap out of it," I said. I wasn't in the mood. With a huge effort, Eric reigned himself in. "When you smell like that," he said, "I just wanna fuck you and bite you and rub myself all over you.


Charlaine Harris


#fairies #humor #intoxication #sookie-stackhouse #vampires

Take care of the sounds and the sense will take care of itself.


Lewis Carroll


#nonsense #prose #verse #humor

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time" so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.


Steven Wright


#humor #nonsense #humor

A library is like an island in the middle of a vast sea of ignorance, particularly if the library is very tall and the surrounding area has been flooded.


Daniel Handler


#ignorance #lemony-snicket #library #humor

Nothing is so common as the desire to be remarkable.


William Shakespeare


#notoriety #humor

People don't understand us. They don't understand me. They think it's so black and white, that he makes me miserable and that I should be with someone else and that I deserve something else. But it's not black and white at all. It's gray. It's a never ending world of gray.


Amanda Grace


#but-i-love-him #connor-and-ann #gray #love #love

Oh, my Margaret--my Margaret! no one can tell what you are to me! Dead--cold as you lie there you are the only woman I ever loved! Oh, Margaret--Margaret!


Elizabeth Gaskell


#north-and-south #thornton #love

Oh! it is absurd to have a hard-and-fast rule about what one should read and what one shouldn't. More than half of modern culture depends on what one shouldn't read.


Oscar Wilde


#humor #literature #reading #humor

I had a romance novel inside me, but I paid three sailors to beat it out of me with steel pipes.


Patton Oswalt


#gender #humor #masculinity #romance #romance-novels






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