#ny

For Breakfast I like my coffee warm and cozy and my eggs funny side up. ↗

— Stanley Victor Paskavich

#funny

He always smelled like warm wood and brandy, even when he hadn't had a drop of drink. Funny how he managed that. Funny how his smell was in her bed. Henry's eyelids fluttered open. Funny how he was in her bed. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#funny

I've heard there’s a lot of bagpiping in that house. I'd love to go check it out." "So...you want to join the secret society of revolutionary plumbers. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#humor #plumbing #secret-society #funny

What?" he asked. "You're staring at me funny." "We're in the wrong movie," I confessed. ↗

— Lou Harper

#funny

I did a charity walk the other day. They asked for money, and I walked.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #funny

However, human beings are funny; we always want what we don't have. ↗

— Apol Lejano-Massebieau

#funny

Funny how people don't really see each other. Men and women. They invent each other in their minds and then they see what they invent.They don't really see each other. Now she was in love with him and she didn't even know his real name, didn't know anything real about him. ↗

— Andrew Klavan

#love #truthful-in-every-way #funny

Count yourself fortunate." He made an elegant sweep of his hand toward the sun. "Daylight does not make them turn to ash, but they become bloody damn infants, whinging on about irritated eyes and sluggish limbs and so forth. ↗

— Lynn Viehl

#humor #vampire #funny

There were dumplings on the train, sold by grim men and women with deep lines cut into their faces by years and worry and hunger and misery. This was the provinces, the outer territories, the mysterious China that had sent millions of girls and boys to Canton to earn their fortunes in the Pearl River Delta. Matthew knew all their strange accents, he spoke their strange Mandarin language, but he was Cantonese, and these were not his people. Those were not his dumplings. ↗

— Cory Doctorow

#funny #humor #funny

Prayers For Rain' begins like practically every Cure song, with an introduction that's longer than most Bo Diddley singles. Never mind the omnipresent chill, why does Robert Smith write such interminable intros? I can put on 'Prayers For Rain,' then cook an omelette in the time it takes him to start singing. He seems to have a rule that the creepier the song, the longer the wait before it actually starts. I'm not sure if Smith spends the intro time applying eye-liner or manually reducing his serotonin level, but one must endure a lot of doom-filled guitar patterns, cathedral-reverb drums and modal string synth wanderings during the opening of 'Prayers for Rain. ↗

— Tom Reynolds

#music #funny