#par

Something you killed didn't stay dead? Wow. That must have really put some termites in your coffin. ↗

— Christopher Farnsworth

#humor #paranormal-suspense #vampires #humor

You know how when someone is tall, people will compare them to a string bean? She, my friend, was like asparagus, but without the subsequent odor. ↗

— Tom Alford

#funny #humor #string-bean #tall #funny

And-he was ashamed to admit--he had been known to carry off the occasional roll of duct tape. That stuff could be used for everything. ↗

— Sharon Ashwood

#paranormal-romance #sharon-ashwood #the-dark-forgotten #unchained #humor

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. It was the future, and everything sucked. ↗

— Greg Nagan

#first-sentence #first-words #humor #opening-lines #parody

MEG (to Dante, the vampire):“Vampires aren’t as cool as I expected them to be. In romance novels, vampires are all dark and broody and sexy. In real life, you talk an awful lot about stocks. ↗

— Sophie Oak

#paranormal-romance #vampires #humor

The cleanest civilization I’ve ever seen…and the number one thing you pack for a wedding is a jar of dirt? ↗

— M.A. George

#paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #wedding-traditions #humor

I have never even idly thought for a single passing second that it might make my life nicer to have a small rude incontinent person follow me around screaming and making me buy them stuff for the rest of my life. ↗

— Tim Kreider

#humor #parent #humor

Suddenly, I saw ocean again—then another horizon line—but this time the deep blue sky was on the wrong side of the line…the Holy crap, we’re upside down side. ↗

— M.A. George

#humor #paranormal-romance #upside-down #humor

I told myself: 'I am surrounded by unknown things.' I imagined man without ears, suspecting the existence of sound as we suspect so many hidden mysteries, man noting acoustic phenomena whose nature and provenance he cannot determine. And I grew afraid of everything around me – afraid of the air, afraid of the night. From the moment we can know almost nothing, and from the moment that everything is limitless, what remains? Does emptiness actually not exist? What does exist in this apparent emptiness? ↗

— Guy de Maupassant

#fear #nihilism #paranoia #imagination

The vast majority of us imagine ourselves as like literature people or math people. But the truth is that the massive processor known as the human brain is neither a literature organ or a math organ. It is both and more. ↗

— John Green

#comparison #literature #math #imagination