#pun

...punctuation marks are the traffic signals of language: they tell us to slow down, notice this, take a detour, and stop. ↗

— Lynne Truss

#punctuation #grammar

A clockwork heart can't replace the real thing. ↗

— Dru Pagliassotti

#love #steampunk #love

He’s bound to have done something,” Nobby repeated. In this he was echoing the Patrician’s view of crime and punishment. If there was a crime, there should be punishment. If the specific criminal should be involved in the punishment process then this was a happy accident, but if not then any criminal would do, and since everyone was undoubtedly guilty of something, the net result was that, in general terms, justice was done. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#ethics #funny #justice #punishment #funny

A brick would make a great lead character in an urban drama, because with 12 edges, a brick would be the edgiest character on TV by two sides.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Punctuation, is? fun! ↗

— Daniel Keyes

#punctuation #humor

I was shocked to read that Lord Ferrers, a Home Office minister, when booked for speeding and presented with a £40 fixed penalty with three penalty points, them wrote to the Suffolk police to thank them for catching him. There is a sickness in England. If his lordship appreciates punishment so much, it was unkind just to fine him. He should have been caned, with his trousers down, by the side of the road. ↗

— Auberon Waugh

#home

It made me realize how I needed to stop punishing her for something she couldn't help [...] because sometimes things happen to people and they're not equipped to deal with them. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#daughter #katniss #mom #punishing #relationships

Well, look what the scamp has dragged home with her. Pirates, henchmen and naughty, naughty men—" A soft whack noise was followed by a startled squawk, as a tea towel hit Nessy in the face. She pulled the cloth down, shooting daggers at her lifetime companion. "What was that for?" Nan tapped her chin. "You're drooling dear, might want to mop up a bit. ↗

— A.W. Exley

#home

Punning is a talent which no man affects to despise but he that is without it. ↗

— Jonathan Swift

#puns #humor

Face it," Gary told her kindly. "You'll never catch up. You just do as much as you can and take the punishments without saying anything. Sometimes I wonder if that isn't what they're really trying to teach us--to take plenty and keep our mouths shut. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#lesson #punishment #understanding #humor