#real

The first year was like icing. Then the cake started to show through … ↗

— John Ashbery

#cake #love #poetry #reality #year

I want to hire someone to stand outside my door and knock three times, with each knock being three years apart. At the end of the nine years I’ll reply, “Who is it?” And without delay or reply, the person on the other side of the door is to find a new job. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #surreal #funny

A brick could be used as a floatation device. But only use it if the person drowning is a politician.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

The werewolf pointed at a bench next to the door into the Kirkwoods’ tomb. “Sit. Wait.” Did I mention werewolves were chatty? ↗

— Mindee Arnett

#just-kidding-not-really #supernatural #humor

One, two, three / Buckle my shoe. ↗

— Robert Benchley

#rhyme #surreal #humor

I'm very much afraid I didn't mean anything but nonsense. ↗

— Lewis Carroll

#humour #reality #humor

These cities grew in approximately the same places as our cities do now, however different the shape of the continents was. There was even a New York that in some way resembled the New York familiar to all of you, but was much newer, or, rather, more awash with new products, new toothbrushes, a New York with its own Manhattan that stretched out dense with skyscrapers gleaming like the nylon bristles of a brand-new toothbrush. ↗

— Italo Calvino

#humor #surreal #humor

I put my forehead on his collarbone, place one hand on his chest. Its rhythm reassures me: He is real, and he is now. ↗

— Lauren Oliver

#love #real #reassurance #love

The monster I kill every day is the monster of realism. The monster who attacks me every day is destruction. Out of the duel comes the transformation. I turn destruction into creation over and over again. ↗

— Anaïs Nin

#creation #destruction #realism #love

A blanket would be a great surface to print my new book on, so you could read it in bed while you’re having boring, obligatory sex with your spouse, who’s as dry and exciting as a sack of flour. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#books #boring #brick-and-blanket #funny #humor