#sat

Just so you know, I’m goin’ to enlist.” “I’m proud of you. But why?” I groan against the pain but manage to give him a half smile. “I want to make sure Kiara’s got a boyfriend who has more to offer than a hot bod and a face that could make angels weep. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#conversation #dick-westford #conversation

I've given guys blow jobs just because I've run out of things to talk about.' Oh, Rae. Who hasn't ↗

— Anne Lamott

#oral-sex #sex #conversation

Most civilisation is based on cowardice. It's so easy to civilize by teaching cowardice. You water down the standards which would lead to bravery. You restrain the will. You regulate the appetites. You fence in the horizons. You make a law for every movement. You deny the existence of chaos. You teach even the children to breathe slowly. You tame. ↗

— Frank Herbert

#civilisation #cowardice #law #cowardice

Nothing can be more notorious than the calumnies and invectives with which the wisest measures and most virtuous characters of The United States have been pursued and traduced [By American Newspapers] ↗

— Thurgood Marshall

#humour #satire #satire

Cecily. This is no time for wearing the shallow mask of manners. When I see a spade I call it a spade. Gwendolen. [Satirically.] I am glad to say that I have never seen a spade. It is obvious that our social spheres have been widely different. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#satire

An Ass put on a Lion's skin and went About the foreset with much merriment, Scaring the foolish beasts by brooks and rocks, Till at last he tried to scare the Fox. But Reynard, hearing from beneath the mane That Raucous voice so petulant and vain, Remarked. O' Ass, I too would run away, But that I know your old familiar bray'. That's just the way with asses, just the way. ↗

— Aesop

#satire #satire

He burst into the house and ate Grandma, an entirely valid course of action for a carnivore such as himself. ↗

— James Finn Garner

#humour #politically-correct #red-riding-hood #satire #wolf

The people heard it, and approved the doctrine, and immediately practiced the contrary. ↗

— Benjamin Franklin

#contradiction #doctrines #paradox #practice #rules

Perhaps,” murmured his lordship, “I yielded to a compassionate impulse.” “A what?” gasped his best friend. “Oh, did you think I never did so?” said his lordship, the satirical glint in his eyes extremely pronounced. “You wrong me! I do, sometimes—not frequently, of course, but every now and then! ↗

— Georgette Heyer

#satire

My pen shall heal, not hurt. ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#satire #writing #satire