#sex

Many Survivors blame themselves for the abuse and continue to feel responsible and guilty for anything bad that happens to them or to other people they know. Survivors often feel bad about themselves and different from other people. They therefore isolate themselves from other people and avoid making close friendships. ↗

— Carolyn Ainscough

#child-abuse #isolation #rape #sexual-abuse #survivors

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#humour #infidelity #parenthood #parenting #sexuality

I felt like an animal, and animals don’t know sin, do they? ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#cool #desire #erotic #erotica #funny

I want to write a book on sex. It will be filled with phrases like "Uuuhgh yeeeaaaah," and "Ooooh that's it," and "Whose hands are those? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#sex #write-a-book #funny

Last time I had sex I was so good I got a standing ovation. Well, actually, I just got the clap. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#sex #std #funny

I wanted to have premarital sex with a midget, but I was afraid the ringmaster would banish me for unlawful carnival knowledge. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #sex #funny

A mechanical toothbrush is the greatest oral device in the history of the sex toy industry. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #sex-toy #funny

I sat on the bed. Neither of us said anything. I wasn't slick and sophisticated enough for this. What do you say to boyfriend A when he finds you naked in the bed of boyfriend B? Especially if boyfriend A turned into a monster the night before and ate someone. I bet Miss Manners didn't cover this at all. ↗

— Laurell K. Hamilton

#funny #miss-manners #polyamory #sex #funny

Rule #1: Always test your sexual prowess on state workers first. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#sexual-prowess #funny

I want to write a book called, "Ten Steps to Asexuality." Of course, I recommend all those steps be taken in Birkenstock sandals. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#book #funny #write #funny