#su

A blanket can be a statement—a generalization and truism covering a multitude of categories, like corruption, ineptitude, ignorance, arrogance, greed, and sloth—which would all fall under the blanket of “Politics.”
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

A blanket and a brick could be put in a ring and paid to fight. Compared to MMA, it would be boring. But compared to boxing, it would be downright thrilling. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

A brick could be affixed to each end of an axle, for an example of transportation in a pre-wheel society. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

A brick is to a blanket, as the moon is to Sun Tzu. Fear my fearlessness!
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

Behind every successful woman, there's a big prick. ↗

— James Patterson

#men #success #funny

What you perceive as a failure today may actually be a crucial step towards the success you seek. Never give up. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#drive #failure #perseverance #richelle #richelle-goodrich

A brick on a stick could be licked like a lollipop.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used to test my new levitation machine. Still, I’d rather test the machine out by seeing if it can lift my heavy, elephantine penis off the floor. But before I turn the machine on, I’m going to ask you to stand at least ten feet back, because I wouldn’t want to accidentally impregnate you. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

These golf people seem unnaturally obsessed. They dress kind of funny too, and it's become a running joke for Gretchen and I to e-mail the most ridiculous golfing pictures back and forth to each other. Sometimes she adds hysterical captions. She never puts them on PitchBitch, though. We can't threaten the gravy train. ↗

— Shawn Klomparens

#golf #humor #funny

My brother was a great swimmer. He was as fast as a shark. Well, almost. It beat him by a half a leg's length, right below the knee. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #shark #funny