#to

I am an independent woman and I am not to be bossed around by some arrogant blonde! ↗

— Tori Otteson

#just-toriness #stupidity #humor

The first thing you find out when yer dog learns to talk is that dogs don't got nothing much to say. About anything. "Need a poo, Todd." "Shut up, Manchee." "Poo. Poo, Todd." "I said shut it. ↗

— Patrick Ness

#knife-of-never-letting-go #manchee #todd #humor

Theatre director: a person engaged by the management to conceal the fact that the players cannot act. ↗

— James Agate

#cannot #conceal #director #engaged #fact

The cartoon me writes the books cartoon people read in the cartoon world, because they need things to read there too. ↗

— Neil Gaiman

#gaiman #humor #neil #humor

Laughter is the stubborn reward of grim times. ↗

— Edward McPherson

#humor #keaton #laughter #humor

She just threatened to throw the next man who shoots at you out the window. Megan is awake. She offered to help. God, Trent, what is it with you and women? ↗

— Kim Harrison

#into-the-woods #jenks #the-hollows #trent-kalamack #humor

You wanna know how to make God laugh?" he said. "Tell him your plans." (God-shaped Hole) ↗

— Tiffany Debartolo

#tiffany-debartolo #humor

Everything has been homogenized. Over time, with television and jet travel, everybody has blended together. Some of our wonderful charm has been lost. ↗

— Bruce Paltrow

#blended #charm #everybody #everything #homogenized

That's right, bitch. Goldie Schwartz. And I'm not a fucking midget. I prefer the term 'fun sized'. ↗

— Jaye Wells

#silver-tongued-devil #humor

In our opposed forms of loneliness and self-recognition and recognition of the other, we touched each other often as we spoke; and on shore in explorations of the past, we strolled with our arms linked... ↗

— Harold Brodkey

#gay #love #old #platonic-love #relationship