#us

I am hated for loving. I am haunted for wanting. ↗

— Morrissey

#lyrics #music #humor

Can you squeeze me into an empty page of your diary and psychologically save me? ↗

— Morrissey

#lyrics #music #humor

I've heard that men are like fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with. ↗

— Jill Shalvis

#humor

Why does everything have to be so hard? [Eragon] wondered. Because, said Saphira, everyone wants to eat, but no one wants to be eaten. ↗

— Christopher Paolini

#inheritance-cycle #humor

Heaven has no taste." "Now-" "And not one single sushi restaurant." A look of pain crossed the angel's suddenly very serious face. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #sushi #humor

Give the People what they want - and they'll get what they deserve. ↗

— The Kinks

#irony #life-lessons #popular-culture #rock-music #wit

Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity. ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#housekeeping #humor #humor

Oh, how I regret not having worn a bikini for the entire year I was twenty-six. If anyone young is reading this, go, right this minute, put on a bikini, and don't take it off until you're thirty-four. ↗

— Nora Ephron

#humorous #skinny #humor

In our world, I rank music somewhere between hair ribbons and rainbows in terms of usefulness. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#music #rainbow #humor

There was enough tension in the room to send a fleet of the nervous running for their tranquilizers. ↗

— Charlaine Harris

#sookie-stackhouse #humor