#zombies

Then you remember that Jack--that's his name, the mac & cheese--plays lacrosse. That's probably where he got all those yummy muscles. You need two hands for lacrosse. A pinky? Damn, you might as well starve yourself. ↗

— Alaya Dawn Johnson

#zombies #zombies

I'd like to sit down with him and pick his brain, just a tiny bite somewhere in the frontal lobe to get a taste of his thoughts" -Warm Bodies ↗

— Isaac Marion

#warm-bodies #zombies #funny

So why are you so mad at me for kissing you?” “Because you took too long. If you'd done that, say, three years ago, we wouldn't have only had one kiss before we both get horribly mutilated. ↗

— Rusty Fischer

#romance-funny #romantic #ushers #vampires #werewolves

Hey!" Caleb snapped as he realized Nick was about to lock him on the outside with their attackers. He pushed the door open and glared at him. "No man left behind." Nick scoffed. "This aint' the army, boy. It's every man for himself. Fall behind. Get eaten ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#paranormal #zombies #humor

The monkey didn't help matters any. He was sitting on top of the microbus, just watching the undead plunge to their end. His face appeared so serene, so intelligent, as if he truly understood the situation. I almost wanted him to turn to me and say, 'This is the turning point of the war! We've finally stopped them! We're finally safe!' But instead his little penis popped out and he peed in my face. ↗

— Max Brooks

#monkey #zombies #humor

Indeed, one concern would be that the initial neoconservative response to a zombie outbreak would be to invade Iraq again out of force of habit. ↗

— Daniel W. Drezner

#politics #zombies #humor

Bodies lay in the sun. Bodies stood in the sun. ↗

— N.J. Hallard

#creepy #horror #scary #zombies #apocalypse

It doesn't matter what clothes you had or what shoes you had, or how cool you were, or how many Facebook friends you garnered, what will matter in the end is what weapons you had, how many zombies you killed, and how long you survived. ↗

— Caleb Eversole

#caleb-eversole #funny #humor #zombies #funny

Hey, Ms. P," Tad called, "what's going on?" She let out a slow breath before she answered. "You won't believe this... Brian Murrey tried to eat Scott Morgan." Nick's eyes widened at the unexpected explanation. Had he heard that right? ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#nick #odd #strange #weird #zombies

How do I appear unthreatening when her lover's blood is running down my chin? ↗

— Isaac Marion

#life #philosophy #zombies #death