#comedy

Women are aroused by the strangest things, like a rock going through their bedroom window ↗

— Josh Stern

#comedy #humor

This,” Alaric explained to Sarah in what he thought was a kindly voice, “isn’t love you’re feeling. Only dopamine. Because Felix isn’t like anyone else you know. Being a creature of the night, he’s new and exciting and activates a neurotransmitter in your brain that releases feelings of euphoria when you’re around him…especially because you know you can never actually be together, and he seems complicated, and perhaps even sensitive and vulnerable at times. But I can assure you: he’s anything but.” “How dare you?” Sarah demanded hotly. “It isn’t dopa…whatever! It’s love! Love! ↗

— Meg Cabot

#dopamine #humor #love #vampires #humor

Last time I was down South I walked into this restaurant, and this white waitress came up to me and said: 'We don't serve colored people here.' "I said: 'that's all right, I don't eat colored people. Bring me a whole fried chicken. ↗

— Dick Gregory

#comedy #humor #racism #humor

I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is. ↗

— Steve Martin

#life-and-living #life

She threw up her hands. "All right. Why not?" Why not?" Sure." His arms fell to his sides. "That's it? I pour my heart out. I love you so much I've got freakin' tears in my eyes. And all I get in return is 'Why not'?" What did you expect? Am I supposed to fall all over you just because you've finally come to your senses?" Would it be too much to ask?"...He'd begun to glare at her again, his eyes growing stormier by the minute."When do you think you might be ready? To fall all over me, that is. ↗

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#contemporary #romance #sep #susan-elizabeth-phillips #love

Sir, he hath not fed of the dainties that are bred in a book; He hath not eat paper, as it were; he hath not drunk ink; his intellect is not replenished; he is only an animal, only sensible in the duller parts... (Act IV, Scene II) ↗

— William Shakespeare

#play #love

Peter and Jessie were like Romeo and Juliet. Have you ever seen that old movie? Starring Leonardo Dicaprio? ↗

— Adele Griffin

#movies

You know, typically a nickname is shorter than the given name.” “Is it?” he asked in mock seriousness. “Oh. Well, tell you what, you can call me…” She waited several beats, thinking of more than a few unkind examples. “I can call you what?” she finally asked. “That’s it.” He shot her his bone-melting smile. “You can just call me. Anytime.” She rolled her eyes, refusing to give in to the smile that threatened. “That sounds like a line from one of your movies.” He shot her a triumphant look. “Ah, ha! I knew you were a fan. ↗

— Jennifer Shirk

#romantic-comedy #movies

I don't mean like balls-in-your-face or gifts of pornography and butt plugs romantic, just cute, over-the-pants, PG-13 movie stuff. ↗

— Frances Winkler

#funny-as-hell #pornography #romantic-comedy-weird #movies

Ganteng bukan segalanya. Kau belum tahu saja, sewaktu-waktu dia bisa berubah menjadi monster yang mengerikan. ↗

— Francisca Todi

#relationship #romance #romance-novels #romantic #romantic-comedy