#comedy

Ever since the robot was first invented, there have been people who swear up and down that this marks the first step towards the fall of man … To be fair, their arguments are backed with scientific fact taken from documentary films such as The Terminator, The Matrix, and RoboCop. ↗

— Weston Locher

#comedy #essay #funny #humor #funny

You took a bath without me?" I smiled to myself at the accusation in his voice. ↗

— Katie MacAlister

#bath #comedy #love #vampires #love

Phoebe doesn't quite believe in fate the way I do. She says you have to chase your destiny, and she always expects life to be like a romantic comedy: all you have to do is dress the part of the heroine, and pretty soon you'll be kissing some hottie while fountains spew and music swells in the background. ↗

— Lauren Morrill

#humor #romantic-comedy #humor

Sebastian,” Katarina said, turning to her nephew. “You’ve grown.” “It happens,” Sebastian quipped, flashing her his usual lopsided grin. “Goodness,” she said with smile, “you’ll be a danger to the ladies soon.” Harry very nearly rolled his eyes. Sebastian had already made conquests of nearly all the girls in the village near Hesslewhite. He must give off some sort of scent, because the females positively fell at his feet. It would have been appalling, except that the girls couldn’t all dance with Sebastian. And Harry was more than happy to be the nearest man standing when the smoke cleared. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#humor #humor

Never let other people bring you down let Jesus be the one who brings you down, because he knows what he is doing ↗

— Skye Daphne

#humor #insperational-story #romance #science-fiction #humor

You will be so dead, dear Sister. Make telpon dari tadi kayak Kroasia ada di sebelah Jakarta aja. Huahahaha ↗

— Sitta Karina

#comedy #humor #humor

It wasn’t enough that I had to worry about playing well and winning the game, but I also had to deal with possibility that one of my teammates could be dragged off the field by the inhabitants of the mental hospital. ↗

— Weston Locher

#comedy #essays #funny #hilarious #humor

You can’t keep bitch-slapping your creativity, or it’ll run away and find a new pimp. ↗

— George Meyer

#creativity #humor #humor

Love is a two-way street constantly under construction. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#humor-relationships #love #romantic-comedy #romanticism #humor

[T]he definition of 'crazy' in show business is a woman who keeps talking even after no one wants to fuck her anymore. ↗

— Tina Fey

#feminism #women #business