#de

Ah coffee. The sweet balm by which we shall accomplish today's tasks. ↗

I can't eat and I can't sleep. I'm not doing well in terms of being a functional human, you know? ↗

I am a master of logic and a powerfully convincing debater. In fact, against my better judgment, I can talk myself out of doing anything. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#debate #dialogue #funny #humor #judgement

Be what you would seem to be - or, if you'd like it put more simply - never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise. ↗

— Lewis Carroll

#wonderland #funny

I waste at least an hour every day lying in bed. Then I waste time pacing. I waste time thinking. I waste time being quiet and not saying anything because I'm afraid I'll stutter. ↗

— Ned Vizzini

#sadness #suicide #funny

I felt like an animal, and animals don’t know sin, do they? ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#cool #desire #erotic #erotica #funny

This is Leo. I'm the... What's my title? Am I like, admiral, or captain, or..." "Repair boy." "Very funny, Piper. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#leo-valdez #piper-mclean #funny

They call me, The Sharkalator ↗

— James Patterson

#funny #gazzy #maximum-ride #name-calling #nicknames

I don't need to worry about identity theft because no one wants to be me. ↗