#drink

Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, but I'll call it AWLTDASH, Alcoholics Who Like to Drink and Stay Home. ↗

— Chelsea Handler

#humor #humor

The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#drinking #humor #humor

Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer. ↗

— W.C. Fields

#drinking #humor #humor

Right, what's there possibly to worry about?" she said. "Just some surgery in the garage with a drunk doctor." Little miss," said Doc, pointing a finger at Cass. "I'm drinking. I'm not drunk. There's a difference." He took another sip from his cup. "But in another ten minutes or so, that might change, so you should stop stalling. ↗

— Gregg Rosenblum

#change

You can learn a lot about a woman by getting smashed with her. ↗

— Tom Waits

#drinking

Claret is the liquor for boys; port for men; but he who aspires to be a hero must drink brandy. ↗

— Samuel Jackson

#claret #drink #men #port #men

I drink to make other people more interesting. ↗

— Ernest Hemingway

#drinking

In football, there were drinks available everywhere you looked. On a golf tournament, you could find one free anywhere you wanted it. In tennis and NBA basketball, everybody had a hospitality suite, and so you could go there and load up if you wanted to. ↗

— Pat Summerall

#available #basketball #could #drinks #everybody

'Twas drink made me fall in love, And love made me run into debt, And though I have struggled and struggled and strove, I cannot get out of them yet. ↗

— Alexander Brome

#debt #drink #fall #get #i

I neither drink nor smoke, because my schoolmaster impressed upon me three cardinal virtues; cleanliness in person, cleanliness in mind; temperance. ↗

— John Burns

#cardinal #cleanliness #drink #i #impressed