#hat

...looking angrily at the wombat: and a moment later, 'Come now, Stephen, this is coming it pretty high: your brute is eating my hat.' 'So he is, too,' said Dr. Maturin. 'But do not be perturbed, Jack; it will do him no harm, at all. His digestive processes-- ↗

— Patrick O'Brian

#humor #wombat #humor

I'm married. And pregnant. ↗

— Edan Lepucki

#impromptu-humor #marriage #what-the-hell #humor

MORGAN: Help me out here. THEO: What's up? MORGAN: Don't make me spell it out, Theo. THEO: Oh. MORGAN:Just talk dirty for a while. THEO: Blue-sky thinking. Thought shower. Full spectrum leadership. MORGAN: NOT corporate dirty. Sex dirty. THEO: I wouldn't know where to start. ↗

— Con Riley

#humor #humor

Who knows himself a braggart, let him fear this, for it will come to pass that every braggart shall be found an ass. ↗

— William Shakespeare

#ass #braggart #bragging #humility #humor

The symbologist made a cryptic sign. "That remains to be seen, as the cat said who voided into the sugar bowl. ↗

— Jack Vance

#naked-lunch #what-lies-beneath #humor

When you visualized a man or a woman carefully, you could always begin to feel pity . . . that was a quality God's image carried with it . . . when you saw the lines at the corners of the eyes, the shape of the mouth, how the hair grew, it was impossible to hate. Hate was just a failure of imagination. ↗

— Graham Greene

#hatred #imagination #imagination

I turned to look into his face one last time. It was as if I could see the whole universe in his eyes. Maybe he was God, maybe he was simply enlightened. I didn't care right then, in that blessed moment, I just loved him. Later, though, the love was to turn to hate, to fear. They seemed so opposite, the feelings, yet they were all one note on his flute. ↗

— Christopher Pike

#hate #love #love

Now, in their love, which was stronger, there were the seeds of hatred and fear and confusion growing at the same time: for love can exist with hatred, each preying on the other, and this is what gives it its greatest fury. ↗

— T.H. White

#love

Love unrequited is violent. He loves you so much that he's turned it into hate. ↗

— Lauren DeStefano

#love #love

Love, when you get fear in it, it's not love any more. It's hate. ↗

— James M. Cain

#hate #love #love