#hum

I’m crazy in love. I’m just crazy. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #love #age

In bed, I can go for hours. Oh yes, I love naps.
 ↗

— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#humor #sex #sleep #age

We made love like green is blue. That’s because we were only half into it, though for the record I was the blue and she was the disinterested yellow.
 ↗

— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#color #colors #disinterest #funny #green

My friends scoffed at my anxiety and said dumb things like, 'Fifty is the new forty!' Which just made me realize that there are a whole lot of other people who suck at math as bad as I do. No. Fifty is fifty. ↗

— Celia Rivenbark

#humor #age

The information age is so psychotic – without the cell phone and Internet, I would be drama free right now. ↗

— Lauren Barnholdt

#humor #information-age #technology #age

I've always felt there are two things a woman should never do after the age of thirty-five: stand in natural light and have a baby... ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#age

It took nearly a year to finish the ever-changing [marriage candidates] list, with the assistance of his sister and his aging spinster aunt, who lorded over their affairs as the self-appointed voice of cultivated reason. During this time, Gabriel struggled to convince straight-from-Oxford Tristan that he must marry, produce heirs, and maintain the family dukedom for Gabriel himself wouldn't marry. He knew he simply did not have the compulsion to inflict that sort of aggravation on a woman. ↗

— Olivia Parker

#marriage #men #age

When Mama starts to move across a room, people pay attention. You can never be sure she's not going to grab you by the top of the head to steady herself. And she's pretty free with that walking stick, too. ↗

— Bailey White

#humor #age

Men are most virile and attractive between the ages of 35 and 55. Under 35 a man has too much to learn, and I don't have time to teach him. ↗

— Hedy Lamarr

#humor #men #age

My mother was tickled and I think kind of proud when my father got hit on my an attractive middle-aged Asian lady who hadn't noticed he was with his family. He was certainly pleased about it. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#humor #marriage #age