Craig Ferguson

If a man doesn't know how to dance he doesn't know how to make love, there I said it! ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#dance #dancing #lovemaking #man #men

If I start giving people what they like I'll turn into one of them and I don't want to be one of them I want to be one of me. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#individuality

I love zombies. If any monster could Riverdance, it would be zombies. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#monsters #zombies #love

I think when you become a parent you go from being a star in the movie of your own life to the supporting player in the movie of someone else's. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#life #parents #life

I didn't say no because between safety and adventure I choose adventure. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#safety

If I have a near-beer, I’m near beer. And if I’m near beer, I’m close to tequila. And if I’m close to tequila, I’m adjacent to cocaine. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#beer #cocaine #drinking #drugs #tequila

Thanks cows. I appreciate your tastiness. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#food #tasty #food

Anyone who's just driven 90 yards against huge men trying to kill them has earned the right to do Jazz hands. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#dance #football #men

I don't just like sexual double entendres I love them, I stroke them, I milk them, I spank them when they're naughty. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#double-entendres #love

I don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling the truth. I know it isn’t fashionable. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#morality #truth #fashion