#hum

In a way, it's nice to know that there are Greek gods out there, because you have somebody to blame when things go wrong. For instance, when you're walking away from a bus that's just been attacked by monster hags and blown up by lightning, and it's raining on top of everything else, most people might think that's just really bad luck; when you're a half-blood, you understand that some devine force is really trying to mess up your day. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #olympians #humor

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. ↗

— Albert Einstein

#human-nature #humor #infinity #philosophy #science

So many books, so little time. ↗

— Frank Zappa

#humor #humor

Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results. ↗

— Narcotics Anonymous

#insanity #life #misattributed-albert-einstein #humor

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away. ↗

— Paul Terry

#humor #laziness #misattributed-to-hutchins #humor

Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company. ↗

— Mark Twain

#humor #misattributed #philosophy #theology #humor

The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept. ↗

— George Carlin

#insanity #lies #lying #self-indulgence #truth

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four people is suffering from a mental illness. Look at your 3 best friends. If they're ok, then it's you. ↗

— Rita Mae Brown

#insanity #humor

Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources ↗

— Albert Einstein

#humor #misattributed #humor

Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#proverb #humor