#hum

Once upon a time she had liked to dance. When she had been about the same age as the little brunette out there who kept lifting her dress up over her head. Now that was living. Just lift your dress if you wanted to get down and don't worry what anyone thought. ↗

— Erin McCarthy

#dance #humor #inspirational #living #age

William slapped him on the shoulder, sending Sex into rapturous convulsions. “Before we do this, I’ve got one question for you. And you can’t lie. This is too important.” A bit sick to his stomach at what such a debaucher could want to know, Paris cast his attention to the black-haired, blue-eyed he-devil. “Ask.” “Are you going to suggest I kiss you for good luck or strength or whatever it is your sex demon needs?” That earned the warrior a two-fingered salute. “So that’s a no?” William asked. Paris worked his jaw. “Here, let me help you off the cliff to the drawbridge.” With no more warning, he shoved William over the ledge. He thought he heard a fading, “ So not cool,” from the bastard as he fell…fell… Splat. ↗

— Gena Showalter

#humor #humor

We're making a list." "And checking it twice." Edward shook his head. ↗

— Laurell K. Hamilton

#humor

My power is discombobulatingly devastating I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm. ↗

— Mike Tyson

#humor

I don't know what it is about the french language, it seems to be scared of coming out of the mouth so it comes out the nose instead. ↗

— P.D.Q. Bach

#humor #humor

A brick is something solid, stable, and yet edgy. In other words, it’s everything a politician isn’t.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Human material seems to have one major defect: it does not like to be considered merely as human material. It finds it hard to endure the feeling that it must resign itself to passive acceptance of changes introduced from above. ↗

— Czeslaw Milosz

#acceptance #changes #considered #defect #does

Don’t overplay your part – underplay your part. That’s the way to play it effectively. ↗

— Art Hochberg

#inspirational #art

You see, that's another thing that my parents gave me: an enormously great sense of humor. ↗

— Liza Minelli

#enormously #gave #great #humor #me

I don't understand women at all. Like how a women can pour boiling hot wax onto their upper thigh, then rip the hair out by the root... and still be afraid of a spider. ↗

— Jerry Seinfeld

#women #humor