#hum

Directors are always changing things at the last minute. Actors will do a scene, and the director will say, ‘Okay, that was perfect, but this time, Bob, instead of saying “What’s for dinner?” you say, “Wait a minute! Benzene is actually a hydrocarbon!” And say it with a Norwegian accent. Also, we think maybe your character should have no arms. ↗

— Dave Barry

#change

They said her duck recipe and the Chinese music were so dramatic everything else sounded anemic. ↗

— Frank McCourt

#chinese #drama #humor #music #music

- It's a small matter, but one which I think shouldn't be overlooked. - Oh Yes? And that is? - That is the simple matter that time travel is an impossibility, you craven buffoon! - Not with the latest miracle of modern horticulture...Gentlemen, please allow me to introduce you to THE TIME SPROUT ! 'Pleased to be here' said the vegetable in question. ↗

— Robert Rankin

#music

Just remember that you're on my list, Marcone. Soon as I get done with all the other evils in this town, you won't be the lesser of them anymore." Marcone stared at me with half-lidded eyes and said, "Eek. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#humor #johnnie-marcone #sarcasm #change

All right. Tell me what I'm looking at." From the improvised Rolling Stones T-shirt bag tied to my sash, Bob the Skull said, in his most caustic voice, "A giant pair of cartoon lips." I muttered a curse and fumbled with the shirt until one of the skull's glowing orange eye sockets was visible. A big goofy magic nerd!" Bob said. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#harry-dresden #humor #change

Give me a minute to get dressed." "You're not dressed?" I smiled in spite of myself at the lighthearted quility of his jest. Until my broken door began to move. "Jace!" I shouted, trying to keep from laughing as I vaulted off the bed and scrambled to stop him. He wasn't seriously trying to sneak a peek; if he had been, he wouldn't have made any noise. But if I let him get away with a joke today, he'd try it for real tomorrow. Jace yelped as I ripped the door from his grasp and leaned it against the frame. Then he sulked, his eyes roaming just far enough south to see my tank top and shorts. "Liar!" he accused, the smile in his eyes ruining his pout. "You're not naked." "I meant I wanted to change." He grinned. "So, go ahead." "Nice try. ↗

— Rachel Vincent

#change

A little snark, properly directed, can change the world. ↗

— Shannon Hale

#snark #change

A bird in the hand, is worth two in the bush. ↗

— Latin

#inspirational

The vast majority of human beings dislike and even actually dread all notions with which they are not familiar... Hence it comes about that at their first appearance innovators have generally been persecuted, and always derided as fools and madmen. ↗

— Aldous Huxley

#actually #always #appearance #been #beings

Oh, China. How I have missed you.' 'And I have missed you, Eliza. But don't worry, next time my aim will be better. ↗

— Derek Landy

#death