#hum

If you like an instrument that sings, play the saxophone. At its best it's like the human voice. ↗

— Stan Getz

#human #human voice #instrument #like #play

In fact, the only things in the flat Crowley devoted any personal attention to were the houseplants. They were huge, and green, and glorious, with shiny, healthy, lustrous leaves. This was because, once a week, Crowley went around the flat with a green plastic plant mister spraying the leaves, and talking to the plants.... Although talking is perhaps the wrong word for what Crowley did. What he did was put the fear of God into them. More precisely, the fear of Crowley. In addition to which, every couple of months Crowley would pick out a plant that was growing too slowly, or succumbing to leaf-wilt, or browning, or just didn't look quite as good as the others, and he would carry it around to all the plants. "Say goodbye to your friend," he'd say to them. "He just couldn't cut it..." Then he would leave the flat with the offending plant, and return an hour or so later with a large empty flower pot, which he would leave somewhere conspicuously around the flat. The plants were the most luxurious, verdant, and beautiful in London. Also the most terrified. ↗

— Neil Gaiman

#houseplants #humor #beauty

He’d never be able to touch her, and as passionate as she was, she would eventually need a man who could. He’d never had to worry about these things before because he’d never been with a woman. Not even before his possession. He’d been too busy then, too involved in his job. Maybe he needed to join Workaholics Anonymous, he thought dryly. He had to be the only millennia-old virgin in history. ↗

— Gena Showalter

#lords-of-the-underworld #virginity #workaholics #business

Here is my final point. About drugs, about alcohol, about pornography and smoking and everything else. What business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, say, think, who I fuck, what I take into my body - as long as I do not harm another human being on this planet? ↗

— Bill Hicks

#comedy #humor #philosophy #business

Subdue your appetites, my dears, and you've conquered human nature . ↗

— Dorothy Canfield Fisher

#conquered #dears #human #human nature #nature

War is a beastly business, it is true, but one proof we are human is our ability to learn, even from it, how better to exist. ↗

— M. F. K. Fisher

#beastly #better #business #even #exist

When you have a crime against humanity that is so awesome in scale and death, it is more than permissible to look around and say, who recently has been declaring war on the United States? Of course, the compass points straight to bin Laden. ↗

— Robert Fisk

#around #awesome #been #bin #compass

After the group vet appointment--during which Lyle scratched the vet, the vet tech, and some poor woman minding her own business in the waiting room--we went back to Sabrina's and re-released the cats to their natural habitat. ↗

— Sarah Dessen

#humor #business

The Americans, who are the most efficient people on the earth, have carried [phrase-making] to such a height of perfection and have invented so wide a range of pithy and hackneyed phrases that they can carry on an amusing and animated conversation without giving a moment’s reflection to what they are saying and so leave their minds free to consider the more important matters of big business and fornication. ↗

— W. Somerset Maugham

#authors #british #humor #business

She suspects her husband, Jake, might be gay." "Did you suggest she ask him?" Mom laughed. "Of course not. Business is slow. ↗

— Lisa Lutz

#business