#humor

People are always doing studies. Now there's one that says drinking coffee can lead to the prevention of memory loss in old age. This is terrible news. Drinking coffee is my greatest pleasure in life. That, and forgetting. ↗

— Ariel Leve

#age

Geddy once joked, 'You're the only guy I know who rehearses to rehearse! ↗

— Neil Peart

#humor

Vaisey looked like a startled earwig. ↗

— Louise Rennison

#humor

You’ll be dethroned faster than a coke snorting beauty queen. ↗

— Eric Luper

#beauty

I have a sudden urge to pitch a tent in the back yard tonight. ↗

— Marie Sexton

#humor

Objection!" Metz shouts. Grounds?" the judge asks. Well...he's my witness! ↗

— Jodi Picoult

#humor #faith

Murder is like potato chips: you can't stop with just one. ↗

— Stephen King

#murder #humor

There’s no need to call me ‘sir,’ Professor. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#humor

Lying is an indispensable part of making life tolerable. ↗

— Bergen Evans

#humor #humor

Sounds like your life just let out a bunch of bad farts. ↗

— Helen Landalf

#life