#humor

That Grace looked annoyed at me. "I didn't say you would go to jail, Junie B.," she said. "I just wish you would say the word correctly, that's all. ↗

— Barbara Park

#humor #humor

the Real-World was a sprawling mess of a book in need of a good editor. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#humor #life #philosophy #reading #humor

Because sometimes in life, Ken didn't always choose Barbie. (Jane Alcott) ↗

— Rachel Gibson

#humor #rachel-gibson #romance-novels #see-jane-score #humor

You know, most men would get discouraged by now. Fortunately for you, I am not most men! ↗

— PePe Le Pew

#love #perseverance #humor

When you have failed at being nice, you’ve actually succeeded in being mean. Success is everywhere if you know where to look for it. ↗

— Katina Ferguson

#humor

My boyfriend dumped me. My best friend won't talk to me. My future is in a garbage can. Everything has turned to crap. Can you please just let me be a sullen teenager. just this once ↗

— J.J. Johnson

#humor

You're not having sex with him. I know these guys, and you don't. I'm trusting you with Claudia Reeshman. You need to trust me about Dean Robillard." She wouldn't let him off that easily. "You're looking for a wife. Maybe I'm just looking for a little fun." "If you need fun," he shot back, 'I'll give you fun." She was stunned. ↗

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#sexy #humor

Im as good as dead, but they haven't buried me yet. ↗

— Walter Moers

#rumo #walter-moers #humor

Wow, girlfriend, you're incompatible with life! And here I thought I was just incompatible with pink. ↗

— MaryJanice Davidson

#humor

Laney held up a hand. "I checked it out. He went there on scholarship and paid the rest with student loans. And he's good looking, too. Nate and I met him for dinner last night, and I subtly learned that he's looking to meet someone" "How did you learn that?" "I asked him if he was looking to meet someone" "that is subtle ↗

— Julie James

#humor