#humor

Razor appeared on his shoulder with a buzzing laugh. "Stupid goblins," he crowed, bouncing up and down, making Kierran sigh. "Funny, stupid goblins think master is funny elf. Ha!" He buzzed once more and sat down, grinning like a psychotic piranha. ↗

— Julie Kagawa

#kierran #psychotic-piranha #razor #funny

The idlest minds are those that inhabit the busiest bodies. The busiest minds are those that inhabit mental hospitals. Love is what occurs in that order. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #insanity #love #funny

I obey the laws of physics in private. I burn the principles of mathematics in public. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #math #physics #funny

Do deaf schizophrenics hear voices in sign language? ↗

— Nick James

#humor

Poetic license is not a license to scribe recklessly. ↗

— C. Kennedy

#writing-advice #writing-craft #writing-humor #writing-philosophy #writing-process

I'd be vegetarian if bacon grew on trees ↗

— Matt Groening

#homer-simpson-quotes #humor #humor

Perhaps you're not crazy, but you're very creative. ↗

— Ellen Sussman

#humor

You have to fight bad days to have best days in your Life. ↗

— Rea Erika Paraz Ebate

#humor

My dad mumbled something unintelligible. "Woo!" Emmett suddenly boomed in his deep bass. "Go Gators!" Jacob and Charlie jumped. The rest of us froze. Charlie recovered, then looked at Emmett over his shoulder. "Florida winning?" "Just scored the first touchdown," Emmett confirmed. He shot a look in my direction, wagging his eyebrows like a villain in vaudeville. "'Bout time somebody scored around here. ↗

— Stephenie Meyer

#charlie #emmett #humor #humor

At the last parent visitation night I'd sorta accidentally watched a majorly nightmarish scene between Aphrodite and her parents. Her dad's the mayor of Tulsa. Her mom might be Satan. ↗

— P.C. Cast

#vampire #humor