#humor

If I ever meet myself,' said Zaphod, 'I'll hit myself so hard I won't know what's hit me. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#zaphod-beeblebrox #humor

You’re getting ahead of yourself, Danika!” she said bracingly. “One thing at a time. Those home things can be wrong! Don’t panic until it’s time to panic! Maybe you’re just dying of some horrible disease and you aren’t even pregnant at all? ↗

— Madelaine Montague

#pregnant #home

Fine! I'll throw on some clothes. Turn around. I'm in my pj's" "I'm a guy. That's like asking a kid not to glance at the candy counter. ↗

— Becca Fitzpatrick

#nora-grey #scott #humor

Even on the most solemn occasions I got away without wearing socks and hid that lack of civilization in high boots ↗

— Albert Einstein

#humor #humor

Well", Fang said, mimicking a thick Southern drawl. "I must say its mighty nice of them Daimons to clean up after themselves when you kill them" He held his hands up to them. "Look Ma, no mess." "Does Fang have an off switch?" Talon asked Vane. ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#night-embrace #talon #humor

Rules and school are tools for fools! I don't give two mules for rules. ↗

— Trenton Lee Stewart

#humor

Ow! My brains! ↗

— Douglas Adams

#zaphod-beeblebrox #humor

I feel like I could be the best, but I’m not going to openly admit that. At least not to any of my clones. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#clone #funny #humor #funny

You would be amazed how many magicians have died after being bitten by mad rabbits. It's far more common than you might think. -Angela the Herbalist ↗

— Christopher Paolini

#humor

James - "Are you paying attention or just trying to make me look like an idoit?" Elizabeth - "Oh, I'm definately paying attention. If you look like an idiot it has nothing to do with me. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#julia-quinn #romance #humor