#humor

You can't possibly ask me to go without having some dinner. It's absurd. I never go without my dinner. No one ever does, except vegetarians and people like that. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor #vegetarianism #humor

Never let the things you can't do, stop you from doing what you can. ↗

— Ronald Reagan

#humor

[I'm] as broke as the ten commandments. ↗

— P.G. Wodehouse

#psmith #wodehouse #humor

Are you?” “What?” “Venomous?” Another savage smile. He touched the tip of one fang with his tongue and when he drew it away, she saw a pearl of golden liquid. “Try me and see.” “Maybe later, after I’ve survived Michaela. ↗

— Nalini Singh

#humor

Oh, Wax has always been solemn, but when he's at his best, there's a smirk underneath. ↗

— Brandon Sanderson

#personality #humor

I said I fell down. Ah. The ground bloodied your nose, split yer lip, and punched ye in th' eye, all at once. I said I don't want to talk about it. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#pride #humor

Did you hear something?" "No." "Did I hear something?" "...I don't know... ↗

— Matt Groening

#humor #lenny #the-simpsons #humor

He was tall and scrawny with a face that could be mistaken with Keith Richards on a bad day. ↗

— Kelley Armstrong

#humor

Snowball?" It's white." Meow." It's so girly." This from a guy who named his poodle Princess." his laughter died. "How do you know about Princess?" Your sister told me. ↗

— Rachel Gibson

#humor #romance #humor

None could guess my confusion, my host of deluded illusions and elusive delusions! A mantle of marble hiding a crumbling core of sandstone. See how they stare at me, wondering, all wondering, at my secret wellspring of wisdom...' Let's kill him,' Crokus muttered, 'if only to put him out of our misery. ↗

— Steven Erikson

#humor #humor