#humor

My Hallway" remarked Lord Akeldama,"Has never seen such lively action. And That, my sugarplums, is saying something! ↗

— Gail Carriger

#hyperbole #humor

Safety tip. When you see smoke run, never wait for fire. ↗

— Danielle Sibarium

#safety #humor

Oh yes, I have learned much from Tremorlor, and so assume a like strategy. Silence, a faint mocking smile suggesting I know more than I do, an air of mystery, yes, and fell knowledge. None could guess my confusion, my host of deluded illusions and elusive delusions! ↗

— Steven Erikson

#humor

أحب الكتب أكثر من الأفلام. فالأفلام تخبرك ما تفكر به. أما الكتاب الجيد يدعك تختار أفكارك بنفسك. في الأفلام تشاهد بيتا باللون الأحمر. في الكتاب، يقول لك هناك بيت أحمر، ويتركك تضع التفاصيل، تختار تصميم السقف، تركن سيارتك أمامه...الخ خيالي دائما ما يتفوق على كل جديد تأتي به الأفلام ↗

— Karen Marie Moning

#humor #movies #reading #humor

Turns out that once you kill a god, people want to talk to you. Paranormal insurance salesmen with special "godslayer" term life policies. Charlatan's with "godproof" armor and extraplanar safe houses for rent. But most notably, other gods... ↗

— Kevin Hearne

#good-humor #hyperbole #humor

I gave my artistic laugh and also threw in some quirky language for good measure. "Lawks-a-mercy, no! I'm going to have a long bath and..." I looked shyly down. Which is pretty impressive to have done artistic laugh, quirky language and shyness all in the space of ten seconds. ↗

— Louise Rennison

#humor

And a secret inward voice in my head was saying (in a strange breathy voice...) Yes, yessss, I will pop round to The Blind Pig. I will 'pop' round because guess who lives at the Blind Pig? It is not a blind pig, it is Alex. ↗

— Louise Rennison

#humor

A lady doctor in the foreground, black horn-rims and white lab coat, suddenly cried, “You people ought to be ashamed of yourselves! Do you realize what you're doing to the reality concepts we're trying to instill in these people? How do you expect them to differentiate between illusion and reality when you do something like this?” ↗

— Donald E. Westlake

#humor

If you meet an angel, you will have not peace, but a fever. ↗

— Stefano Benni

#fever #humor #peace #humor

When you by nature subscribe to the view that everyone except yourself is a berk or a wanker, it is hard to bond with anybody in any rational common cause. ↗

— Lynne Truss

#humor