#humour

Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#funny #humour #funny

My comedy is for children from three to 93. You do need a slightly childish sense of humour and if you haven't got that, it's very sad. ↗

— Norman Wisdom

#children #comedy #got #haven #humour

I don't mock things, which makes me more vulnerable to mockery myself. If you're cynical, you're protected from mockery. But I have to be nice. I don't think I have irony. A sense of humour, yes, but not irony. ↗

— Michel Gondry

#cynical #humour #i #irony #makes

Hello, Harry" said George, beaming at him. "We thought we heard your dulcet tones." "You don't want to bottle up your anger like that, Harry, let it all out," said Fred, also beaming. "There might be a couple of people fifty miles away who didn't hear you. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#anger

I have never listened to anyone who criticized my taste in space travel, sideshows or gorillas. When this occurs, I pack up my dinosaurs and leave the room. ↗

— Ray Bradbury

#individuality #science-fiction #art

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#funny #humour #neighborhoods #funny

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#humor #humour #work #writing #humor

God does not play dice, bankers do. ↗

— Greg Curtis

#humour #money #money

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#humour

Her lips full and inviting, she has an infectious laugh and glassy cackle in her eyes, and a 2000 volt sexual charisma that beckons me like a fluff girl on scuffed knees. ↗

— Brett Tate

#funny #humor #humour #memoir #sex