#humour

The hall-mark of American humour is its pose of illiteracy. ↗

— Ronald Knox

#humour #illiteracy #pose

My mother tells me I do not chew my food enough; she says I am making it harder for my body to get the essential nutrients it needs. If she were here, I would remind her that I am eating a blueberry Pop-Tart. ↗

— Joe Dunthorne

#food #humour #food

No man can be an agnostic who has a sense of humour. ↗

— E. M. Forster

#humour #man #sense #who

When I was in film school, it was said that all good films were characterised by some form of humour. ↗

— Lars von Trier

#film #film school #films #form #good

I mean to do something grand. I don't know what, yet; but when I'm grown up I shall find out.Perhaps,it will be rowing out in boats, and saving peoples' lives,like that girl in the book. Or perhaps I shall go and nurse in the hospital, like Miss Nightingale. Or else I'll head a crusade and ride on a white horse, with armor and a helmet on my head, and carry a sacred flag. Or if I don't do that, I'll paint pictures,or sing, or scalp – sculp – what is it? you know – make figures in marble. Anyhow it shall be something. ↗

— Susan Coolidge

#inspirational #family

one blow in anger [would] kill, probably, a child from aged two to eight. Those over eight would take two blows to kill. ↗

— Patricia Highsmith

#crime #humour #inspirational #murder #age

I think it's like music for the sake of music, and a lot of the words stem from liking music a lot, wanting to be a good band and having a good sense of humour, and living in a situation where we're free to pretty much do what we want. ↗

— Jon Fishman

#free #good #good band #good sense #having

Marry, don't marry,' Auntie Aya says as we unfold layers of dough to make an apple strudel. Just don't have your babies unless it's absolutely necessary.' How do I know if it's necessary?' She stops and stares ahead, her hands gloved in flour. 'Ask yourself, Do I want a baby or do I want to make a cake? The answer will come to you like bells ringing.' She flickers her fingers in the air by her ear. 'For me, almost always, the answer was cake. ↗

— Diana Abu-Jaber

#food #humour #food

Cal: “I’m not presuming. I know exactly what you think about me. You think I’m an anal-retentive Armrest Nazi . . . an arrogant Modelizer. You can’t stand the way I talk, any of the subjects I choose to talk about, the imperious manner I order food in restaurants or tell cab drivers how much we owe them. You find my taste in women odious, the fact that I don’t own a television an unforgivable sin, and the fact that I would choose to write a book about Saudi Arabia completely unfathomable. And you’re also totally in love with me. If you weren’t you wouldn’t have pushed me into the pool earlier today when you saw Grazi walk in.” Every Boy's Got One ↗

— Meg Cabot

#love #romantic #food

We survived for days on nothing but food and water. ↗

— W.C. Fields

#food