#humour

I feel that life is divided into the horrible and the miserable. That's the two categories. The horrible are like, I don't know, terminal cases, you know, and blind people, crippled. I don't know how they get through life. It's amazing to me. And the miserable is everyone else. So you should be thankful that you're miserable, because that's very lucky, to be miserable. ↗

— Woody Allen

#life #life

We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#life #science #technology #life

My aunt and overprivileged cousin only recognize two states of being: glitter and grunge. And if you weren’t glitter, well, that only left one other option. ↗

— Rachel Vincent

#irony-of-life #life

Gideon laughed. "I like to be direct." "Okay," I said. "But I warn you, I like to be evasive, inserutable and generally send mixed messages." "I doubt it." "Human interaction is not my strong point," I told him. "Not seriously." "Seriously," I said. Thinking: There is so much about me he doesn't know. Gideon put his hand on my leg. "What's your strong point, then?" "Goats," I told him. "I am excellent with goats. ↗

— E. Lockhart

#chicklit #cute #humor #humorous #humour

I fell in love with football as I was later to fall in love with women: suddenly, inexplicably, uncritically, giving no thought to the pain or disruption it would bring with it. ↗

— Nick Hornby

#fooball #humour #life #life

This won't look so good in my obituary," Schaffer said dolefully. There was a perceptible edge of strain under the lightly-spoken words."Gave his life for his country in a ladies' lavatory in Upper Bavaria. ↗

— Alistair Maclean

#maclean #life

Incidentally, I only have one cavity, and as much as my dentist asks me to, I just can't bring myself to floss. ↗

— Stephen Chbosky

#humour #life #life

The past is truly an inoperable tumor that spreads to the present. ↗

— Steve Tolz

#life #life

Darling, whose book is this to be?" "Ostensibly yours, my sweet" "I see -- rather like my life since I met you?" "Yes darling ↗

— John Wyndham

#relationships #life

She didn't know what a goji berry was, but it sounded like something Amazonian tribesmen might eat when they wanted to talk to their ancestors and embark on an inner voyage into some sort of unicorn-infested netherworld. Whatever worked. ↗

— Lola Salt

#humour #romance #life