#humour

Nate shook his head with a crooked grin. "You haven't gone Back to the Future, McFly. ↗

— Elizabeth Sharp

#humour #nature

The name of the new religion," said Rumfoord, "is The Church of God the Utterly Indifferent. ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#religion

A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. He didn't help me a bit. If it was up to him, Cesar Millan would be up here with that damn dog. So all I can say is, 'suck it, Jesus! This award is my God now'! ↗

— Kathy Griffin

#blasphemy #comedy #humor #humour #religion

If heaven really exists: then heaven is the job, hell is unemployment, while life is merely an interview. ↗

— Mokokoma Mokhonoana

#heaven #heaven-and-hell #hell #humor #humour

Babbage's Three Laws of Difference Engines First Law: A difference engine must have at least six cogs. Second Law: A difference engine must be able to operate a loom. Third law: A difference engine must be able to kill a man, should the mood so take it. ↗

— Gideon Defoe

#humour #robotics #steampunk #romantic

She’d never known a man whose initial move was to undress the woman he wanted. ↗

— Tara Janzen

#romance #romantic-suspense #romantic

You can’t possibly be afraid of trees. ↗

— Tara Janzen

#romance #romantic-suspense #romantic

I like you but you mightn't feel the same way about me, and I wouldn't blame you. To save us both from any awkward moments I've figured out an easy way to do this. Nod if you're even slightly interested in getting to know me. Write a ten page explanation if you're not. ↗

— Bill Condon

#love #romantic #love

I don’t know why Kate was trying to impress him, as far as I could see the guy had all the allure and social grace of a psychotic slug with halitosis and a bad head cold. ↗

— Sharon Sant

#humour #quirky-characters #romantic-comedy #sisters #ya

Wash: Psychic, though? That sounds like something out of science fiction. Zoe: We live in a space ship, dear. ↗

— Joss Whedon

#humour #irony #science-fiction #science