#lol

I'm simpley one hell of a butler. ↗

— Sebastian Michealis

#black #butler #funny #hell #i-m

Shoes are stupid. Why do people wear them?" -Bliss He laughed, "So they don't step on a nail and get tetanus, that's why." -Cade "Wear. Where. Wear. W's are wwweeird."-Bliss ↗

— Cora Carmack

#lol #lol

Which brings me to the point of this call." Thank God, baby Jesus, and the Holy Ghost. ↗

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

#j-lynn #jennifer-l-armentrout #lol #wait-for-you #lol

We all know whose side you're on," marshall says, picking him up and launching him toward the window. The explosive sound of glass shattering fills the room. The walls tremble from the sheer heft of his violent exit. "What the hell?" Barron rushes in with a needle at the ready. "I've removed your son from the premises per Skyla's wishes. ↗

— Addison Moore

#lol #marshall #toxic #lol

There will be no slandering of celestial beings. I've warned you on countless occasions." "If said celestial beings weren't spreading celestial rumors, perhaps I wouldn't be moved to wrench celestial balls. ↗

— Addison Moore

#lol #skyla #toxic #lol

Right. Like I'm going to lose my freaking mind and hop right down the demonic bunny trail with Marshall so he can paw me every chance he gets. ↗

— Addison Moore

#lol #skyla #toxic #lol

Yes, well, how was I to know you would be so dramatic? Really, Francine, I don’t know where you get it from.” Then she primly grabbed the fowling gun before departing from the room. ↗

— Jade Lee

#lol

Tell me it's not true." He sighed. "Fine. It's not true." ... And yet... "Are you lying?" He rolled his eyes. "Of course I'm lying." "Not cool." I muttered. Kyle shrugged. "I didn't want you to start hyperventilating again." His hair fell over his eyes and he brushed it aside. "I figured annoying you was safer than admitting anything. ↗

— Kathleen Peacock

#kyle #lol #lying #mac #lol

She is INSANE," I scream, standing in the middle of Marshall's living room. "Of course, she's insane. That would be your genealogy by the way. ↗

— Addison Moore

#marshall #skyla #toxic #lol

I had to make water ” I said. It was the classic female excuse and no male in recorded history had ever questioned it. “I see ” the Inspector said and left it at that. Later I would have a quick piddle behind the caravan for insurance purposes. No one would be any the wiser. ↗

— Alan Bradley

#hilarious #lol #lol