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#m

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #m




Dwarfs were not a naturally religious species, but in a world where pit props could crack without warning and pockets of fire damp could suddenly explode they'd seen the need for gods as the sort of supernatural equivalent of a hard hat. Besides, when you hit your thumb with an eight-pound hammer it's nice to be able to blaspheme. It takes a very special and strong-minded kind of atheist to jump up and down with their hand clasped under their other armpit and shout, "Oh, random-fluctuations-in-the-space-time-continuum!" or "Aaargh, primitive-and-outmoded-concept on a crutch! ↗


— Terry Pratchett


#funny #humour #religion #funny

I've lived a full life. I never once went hungry. ↗


— Bauvard


#funny #humor #hunger #life #funny

I want you to know, chickens aren’t sexy. Not to me.” This was met with silence. “Are you there?” She was slurring her words now, which was embarrassing, so she took a deep breath. “Cam? Can you hear me?” “Yes, chickens aren’t sexy. Uh…I don’t think they’re meant to be. ↗


— Jill Shalvis


#humour #romance #romantic-comedy #funny

Just at present you only see the tree by the light of the lamp. I wonder when you would ever see the lamp by the light of the tree. ↗


— G.K. Chesterton


#gabriel-syme #lamp #order #tree #funny

Well," he said, "I think we've found our way in. We just wait until they're duking it out, but trust me, these Humans First types don't have a lot of staying power or they'd have been at the gym with me before. I doubt Grandma Kent there is going to do a lot of damage." He pointed at a gray-haired, hunched lady in a shawl, carrying what looked liked a gardening tool. "It's like Plants Versus Zombies, and I'm not rooting for the zombies, weirdly enough. ↗


— Rachel Caine


#human #humor #plants #shane #zombie

There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up. ↗


— Kristen Chandler


#morning #funny

Seven smirked as he walked back over to me. "I gave you catharsis last night. Twice. ↗


— T.J. Klune


#catharsis #funny #humor #funny

Bring on hyperinflation! I want to be a millionaire with minimal work. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#humor #hyperinflation #funny

So I got a new job, and I start tomorrow. I’m excited to have a job, and bummed out I’m going to be working. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#funny #humor #job #working #funny

If you're heading downtown from Centeral Park, my advice is to take the subway. Flying pigs are faster but way more dangerous ↗


— Rick Riordan


#flying-pigs #funny-and-random #subways #funny






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