#mo

First rule of Angel Club, you do not talk about Angel Club. ↗

— Cynthia Hand

#humor #humor

As for hearing, the sloth is not so much deaf as uninterested in sound. ↗

— Yann Martel

#humor #senses #humor

I had to quit my taxi cab driving job because I had no way to get to work. The problem was I kept calling myself to come pick me up. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #job #taxi #work #funny

I was wasting my life, always thinking about myself. ↗

— Morrissey

#life #lyrics #music #humor

Torture?” she asked with a laugh. “My first piece of information I’ll divulge to you? I wouldn’t recommend trying to torture me. I dislike it and grow sulky under pincers. It’s a fault. ↗

— Kresley Cole

#humour #humor

Honey, that man would do anything to keep you. Lie, steal, cheat, kill, clean up after himself, and do laundry. ↗

— Alisa Sheckley

#humor #paranormal #humor

True love can blossom in unexpected places. This is Jaden pretending not to notice. ↗

— Katie Klein

#humor

What if two people want to be your partner, then what? ↗

— Emily Giffin

#humor #humor

The Postmodernists' tyranny wears people down by boredom and semi-literate prose. ↗

— Christopher Hitchens

#literature #postmodernism #humor

You ever get any death threats? How about ex-husbands or ex-boyfriends? You run over anyone recently?” ~ Morelli ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#joe-morelli #morelli #stephanie-plum #death