#mon

Adamant," Doren said proudly, handing over the shield. "We fished it out of the tar pit where we found the shirt of mail." "Probably all belonged to the same careless adventurer," Newel speculated. "Too much money, not enough talent. ↗

— Brandon Mull

#humor #money #talent #funny

Especially well known around the office is my weakness for dyspareunist women. Most people would find such disparity in unity repelling, but it harmonizes perfectly with my personal tastes. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#funny #harmony #funny

Mystics are all a bit funny in the head anyway," the priest added cynically, "which is why the church locks them all up in mental hospitals and euphemistically calls these institutions monasteries. ↗

— Robert Anton Wilson

#sarcasm #funny

Dont talk to the crazy kids. I longed to shout back that we weren't crazy. I'd mistaken her kid for a ghost, that's all. ↗

— Kelley Armstrong

#ghost #the-summoning #funny

I can be a dickhead and I do it on purpose. I tend to bully people into doing what I want. And I let everything that had happened with Dawson amplify those…uh, personality traits. But—” He removed his finger, and his grin spread into a smile. “But you…you make me want to be different. That’s why I didn’t kill Blake. It’s why I don’t want you making those decisions or for you to be around me if I am choosing those things. ↗

— Jennifer L. Armentrout

#bullying

Have you tried talking to her?" "No, we've been punching her repeatedly in the face instead. Why, do you think that won't work? ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #sarcasm #simon-lewis #sarcasm

It is, after all, far too easy to pinch and kick the bizarre Mormon Church; to say it's ripe for satire and parody is to say a Catholic schoolgirl is ripe for debauchery. It's like shooting polygamist fish in a barrel of coffee. ↗

— Mark Morford

#child-abuse #mormonism #catholicism

You got secrets you better keep Take flight before she cuts you deep - Sam's song ↗

— Helen Boswell

#impiorum #mythology #songs-lyrics #urban-fantasy #wicked

Lucius didn’t believe in werewolves. He said that people were too horrible for any other monsters to exist, which he thought was a shame. ↗

— Rasmenia Massoud

#monsters #people #werewolves

I don't know that she is as amusing as she was when she was a child, but she makes me love her and I like people who make me love them. It saves me so much trouble in making myself love them. ↗

— L.M. Montgomery

#love #love