#na

I know now, just quite how My life and love might still go on In your heart, in your mind I'll stay with you for all of time. ↗

— Alex Band

#loss #unconditional-love #life

Theatre director: a person engaged by the management to conceal the fact that the players cannot act. ↗

— James Agate

#cannot #conceal #director #engaged #fact

My sweat smells like peanut-butter. ↗

— Wendy Mass

#inspirational #humor

There are levels of humor. The level above mine is invisible and inaudible. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#inaudible #invisible #levels #humor

Kahlan ambled toward the door. "Well, my breasts aren't as large as yours Berdine." She slowed as she passed Raina. "I think Raina's hands would fit mine better. ↗

— Terry Goodkind

#humor #kahlan #raina #humor

You know,” OreSeur muttered quietly, obviously counting on her tin to let Vin hear him, “it seems that these meetings would be more productive if someone forgot to invite those two.” Vin smiled. “They’re not that bad,” she whispered. OreSeur raised an eyebrow. “Okay,” Vin said. “They do distract us a little bit.” “I could always eat on of them, if you wish,” OreSeur said. “That might speed things up.” Vin paused. OreSeur, however had a strange little smile on his lips. “Kandra humor, Mistress. I apologize. We can be a bit grim.” Vin smiled. “They probably wouldn’t taste very good anyway. Ham’s far too stringy, and you don’t want to know the kinds of things that Breeze spends his time eating….” “I’m not sure,” OreSeur said. “One is, after all, named ‘Ham.’ As for the other…” He nodded to the cup of wine in Breeze’s hand. “He does seem quite fond of marinating himself. ↗

— Brandon Sanderson

#marinating-oneself #humor

Before a Cat will condescend To treat you as a trusted friend, Some little token of esteem Is needed, like a dish of cream; And you might now and then supply Some caviare, or Strassburg Pie, Some potted grouse, or salmon paste — He's sure to have his personal taste. (I know a Cat, who makes a habit Of eating nothing else but rabbit, And when he's finished, licks his paws So's not to waste the onion sauce.) A Cat's entitled to expect These evidences of respect. And so in time you reach your aim, And finally call him by his name. ↗

— T.S. Eliot

#bribery #cats #food #friendship #names

Words cannot express my disappointment that I must pass on the invitation to once again witness your gelatinous buttocks swaying as you try to climb a greased pole naked in search of athletic glory. Sadly, the last occasion on which I witnessed this event had a deleterious effect on my psyche for which I am still seeking the attention of a therapist. A.C. Kemp as Lady Arabella Snark ↗

— A.C. Kemp

#insult #snark #humor

Is she always like this?" "No, usually worse. ↗

— Steve Voake

#personality #humor

A true friend finds a way to celebrate—even in the worst moments of life—and forces it upon you. ↗

— Rionna Morgan

#friends #friendship #insprational #friendship