#nipples

Opinions are like nipples, everybody has one. Some have firm points, others are barely discernible through layers, and some are displayed at every opportunity regardless of whether the audience has stated "I am interested in your nipples" or not. ↗

— David Thorne

#nipples #opinions #humor

Last night the secrets of the universe were revealed to me, and they had nipples. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#nipples #secrets #universe #change

I’ll tug at your breasts like a thirsty child. Try not to burn your nipples in my hot coffee. While you’re at it, I also like sugar in my coffee. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#breasts #child #coffee #cream #drink

Why do men have nipples? Because God is a woman and she really wants us to enjoy ourselves, that's why. ↗

— Cameron Dean

#nipples #men

Several famous people have licked my nipples. Well, indirectly. First they licked the stamps, and then I peeled them off the letters and stuck them on my nipples.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#celebrity #fame #funny #humor #letter