#ny

I do know you're nothing like him. But you're still....still a lot. A lot to handle. I don't mean your junk, obviously, as we've not gotten to the fondling-bits stage yet. And I can't believe I just talked about your junk. ↗

— Nicole Peeler

#funny-and-random #jane-true #funny

Tag opened the door to his knock, and with a look of disappointment, peered behind Wade. "You got someone better coming over?" Wade asked him. "Pizza," Tag said. ↗

— Jill Shalvis

#humour #funny

Who knew Demon Child would have such a normal name? I expected something exotic like Serena or Destiny or the Evil One That Comes in the Night to Make Us Chilly. ↗

— Darynda Jones

#humor #snarky #witty #funny

I never said nothing..." "I know you never! I could hear you not saying anything! You've got the loudest silences I ever did hear from anyone who wasn't dead! ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #humorous #funny

The rage that had expolded inside me diffused. I didn't know where it had come from. I had a short temper and often acted impulsively,but this had been intense and ugly even for me. Weird. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#funny

I was in a tailspin of confusion I hadn't experienced since the first time I heard George W. Bush speak. ↗

— Chelsea Handler

#funny

A comedy isn’t about being funny...a comedy is about characters who dare to know that they may choose a happy ending after all. ↗

— Gary D. Schmidt

#happy-ending #shakespeare #funny

He left the key in the ignition. No one was likely to come up here and steal the truck- and if anyone did... well, he could deal with Charles ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#charles-cornick #funny #funny

I wouldna cross the road to see a scrawny woman if she was stark naked and dripping wet. ~Jamie Fraser ↗

— Diana Gabaldon

#funny #jamie-fraser #outlander #scotland #skinny

Hasn't anyone ever told you," Jesse asked, in a semi-amused voice, "that a gentlemen never lays a hand on a lady?" Which I thought was king of funny, considering where Jesse had had his hand the last time I'd seen him ↗

— Meg Cabot

#funny