#omen

If given the choice, I’d take five ones over a five-dollar bill, because women prefer men with lots of money.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #choice #funny #humor #money

Women are controlled by men like a currency of the world. ↗

— Bryant McGill

#power #women-and-men #men

Cheap jewelry, however, is worse than no jewelry at all, and there are very few things in life than are worse than no jewelry at all. ↗

— Jill Conner Browne

#jewelry #women #humor

And I was fairly certain that my strong-enough-for-King-Kong-but-made-for-a-woman deodorant had utterly failed. --Doom with a View ↗

— Victoria Laurie

#humor #psychic-eye #women #humor

You know what Marshall needs to do. He needs to stop being sad. When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be awesome instead. True story. ↗

— Barney Stinson

#happiness #humor #inspirational #sadness #humor

If women were as good as men they'd be a lot better! ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#men #women #humor

It stands to reason that anyone who learns to live well will die well. The skills are the same: being present in the moment, and humble, and brave, and keeping a sense of humor. (361) ↗

— Victoria Moran

#dying #humility #humor #living #mindfulness

Lucifer will be furious with you for failing, but it's not like he can do anything about it. Women don't always do what you want, even if you're Lord of the Underworld. ↗

— Trinity Faegen

#humor #strong-willed #women #humor

Everybody must be managed. Queens must be managed. Kings must be managed, for men want managing almost as much as women, and that's saying a good deal. ↗

— Thomas Hardy

#kings #men #queens #women #humor

That could be a very sexy story. ↗

— LynDee Walker

#humor #mystery #news #reporter #women