#or

[Dad] So your intentions were good. That's what matters. [Anthony] But isn't, like, the road to hell paved with good intentions? Yeah, well, so's the road to heaven. And if you spend too much time thinking about where those good intentions are taking you, you know where you end up? Jersey? I was thinking 'nowhere,' but you get the point. ↗

— Neal Shusterman

#intentions #sayings #humor

Normal.... What the majority of people look, act, and talk and like. So what if the majority became what we see as wierd now? Would our normal, become our new wierd? ↗

— Catherine

#humor #normality #people #popularity #strangeness

You know what we call you? Bitch Spice, Burtch Spice, Slut Spice and Stupid Spice.' Thomas Mackee says this ↗

— Melina Marchetta

#humor

Hört auf zu streiten, oder ich tue so, als ob ich in Ohnmacht falle. Vielleicht schreie ich auch ein bisschen. ↗

— Kai Meyer

#iole #humor

When life gives you lemons, say cool, what else you got? ↗

— Carmen in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants

#lemon #life #humor

Oh yes, I'm at my happiest when I have a good idea and I'm drawing it well, and it comes out well and somebody laughs at it. ↗

— Charles M. Schulz

#humor #humor

Librarians are notorious snitches—don’t let anybody convince you otherwise. ↗

— Tom Upton

#teen #teenager #young-adult #humor

It was suicide, wasn't it?" "In an involuntary sort of way," said Vorob'yev. "These Cetagandan political suicides can get awfully messy, when the principal won't cooperate." "Thirty-two stab wounds in the back, worst case of suicide they ever saw?" murmured Ivan, clearly fascinated by the gossip. "Exactly, my lord. ↗

— Lois McMaster Bujold

#suicide #humor

It's a terrible thing for a man when his woman gangs up on him wi' a toad ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#husband #marriage #toads #wife #humor

Well, hell,” muttered Drake. “Do you do that to all the human women?” “No. Usually they’ve already started taking off their clothes by now. She’s beginning to hurt my feelings.” “We need to get you a paper bag or a giant scar or something.” “Yeah,” said the man, his tone dry. “I’ll get right to work on that ↗

— Shannon K. Butcher

#humor