#sarcasm

I got an 'A' in Business Marketing in college!- as if that means a goddamn thing in the real world... ↗

— Whitney Gracia Williams

#sarcasm #business

Your quick ‘no’ is because I refused to say ‘yes’ to sex. They say men think with their dicks. I hope you do not run Easton with your— ↗

— Avery Aster

#erotica-romance #sarcasm-humor #men

Oh, that's great. That way, when things have quieted down, and we come up for air, or money, or re-supply, we'll get a nice explosive package from him that says "so nice to see you again" in a way that only multi-megaton yields can. -Captain Tagon ↗

— Howard Tayler

#explosives #humour #mercenaries #sarcasm #money

So this was the rest of his life. It felt like a party to which he'd been invited, but at an address he couldn't actually locate. Someone must be having fun at it, this life of his; only, right at the moment, it wasn't him. ↗

— Margaret Atwood

#life

The bastard kissed her. She was so mad, she bit him hard enough to draw blood. Raphael pulled back, lip already beginning to swell. “We are no longer even, Elena. You’re now in debt.” “You can deduct it from my slow and painful death. ↗

— Nalini Singh

#elena #raphael #sarcasm #sex #death

Give a hippie too much money and anything can happen. ↗

— Neil Young

#money #sarcasm-humor #dreams

Costin regained his serious tone but his eyes softened. "I won't force you into anything Sally. I know this is all different to you. I've known all my life that I had one perfect mate out there for me. And when I look at you, I'm in awe of what I've been given." Sally blushed as he paused. "I won't leave you unprotected, and allowing other males around you is something that neither I, nor my wolf, will be able to handle. Besides," he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief, "how could you not want to be around all this?" Sally let out a snort. "You've been around Jen way too much." "I don't know, she's quite educational." "Yeah, I don’t think I really want you to be educated by her. ↗

— Quinn Loftis

#educated #humour #jen #sally #sarcasm

The more this guy talked, the more he sounded like a fortune cookie. ↗

— Kelly Creagh

#raynolds #sarcasm #mystery

What did Isabelle want?" Jace asked. Alec hesitated. "Isabelle says the Queen of the Seelie Court has requested an audience with us." "Sure," said Magnus. "And Madonna wants me as a backup dancer on her next world tour." Alec looked puzzled. "Who's Madonna?" "Who's the Queen of the Seelie Court?" said Clary. "She is the Queen of Faerie," said Magnus. "Well, the local one, anyway." Jace put his head in his hands. "Tell Isabelle no." "But she thinks it's a good idea," Alec protested. "Then tell her no twice. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#funny #madonna #sarcasm #funny

Jace said that the cast of Gilligan's Island could do something anatomically unlikely with themselves. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#funny #gilligan-s-island #jace #laugh #mortal-instruments