#sausage

The x-ray of your skull shows a large, flobby mass floating inside. I have to consult my colleagues to be certain, but it looks like a long sausage snarled into a lump. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#funny #sausage #x-ray #funny

There was something sort of bleak about her tone, rather as if she had swallowed an east wind. This I took to be due to the fact that she probably hadn't breakfasted. It's only after a bit of breakfast that I'm able to regard the world with that sunny cheeriness which makes a fellow the universal favourite. I'm never much of a lad till I've engulfed an egg or two and a beaker of coffee. "I suppose you haven't breakfasted?" "I have not yet breakfasted." "Won't you have an egg or something? Or a sausage or something? Or something?" "No, thank you." She spoke as if she belonged to an anti-sausage league or a league for the suppression of eggs. There was a bit of silence. ↗

— P.G. Wodehouse

#food #good-humor #humor #sausage #food

I used to help my granddaddy make sausage. He would mix it up in a cleaned-out washtub with his hands, no gloves. Man, if we did anything like that today, they would jack the jail up and throw us under it. ↗

— Jimmy Dean

#did #gloves #granddaddy #hands #help

I found that when I went from Albany to Savannah, that I needed to put that white rice away, and I needed to turn that into Savannah red rice because they were big into that sausage, tomato-y, bell pepper-y rice mixture. ↗

— Paula Deen

#away #because #bell #big #found

Profits, like sausages... are esteemed most by those who know least about what goes into them. ↗

— Alvin Toffler

#esteemed #goes #into #know #least

Lawsuit: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#come #go #into #lawsuit #machine

A highbrow is the kind of person who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso. ↗

— Alan Patrick Herbert

#kind #looks #person #picasso #sausage

My favorite fall or winter lunch is big steaming bowls of soup. I usually invite people for around 12:30 and have two hearty soups like shrimp corn chowder and lentil sausage soup, which can be made a day or two ahead. ↗

— Ina Garten

#around #big #bowls #corn #day

I found university a little dispiriting. I thought I would enter the great halls of Plato, but instead I entered the halls of an intellectual sausage factory. I wanted to do something not on the main course, and chose the environment. ↗

— Bjorn Lomborg

#course #enter #entered #environment #factory

I don't normally cook, but if I did it probably would be beans, sausage, bacon and eggs. I never really get to eat that to be honest. ↗

— Wayne Rooney

#beans #cook #did #eat #eggs