#toilet

Yup, the toilet is my best friend before a show. ↗

— Eric Carr

#best #best friend #friend #show #toilet

You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar. ↗

— George Carlin

#candy #chocolate #eating #feeling #know

I'm horrible to live with. I don't clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet. ↗

— Megan Fox

#clothes #end #flush #forget #horrible

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. ↗

— Richard M. Nixon

#castro #even #go #nickel #put

Writers often have the cleanest windows, floors, fridges and toilets, the most up-to-date filing system or the best record for returning calls or e-mails because, in the moment, just about any task seems more palatable than sitting down to write.” (p.136) ↗

— Mark David Gerson

#filing #floors #fridges #returning-calls #toilets

No, thanks," said Harry. "The toilet's never had anything as horrible as your head down it - it might be sick." Then he ran, before Dudley could work out what he'd said. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#harry-potter #humor #toilet #humor

The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys to the toilet. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#holly #lep #mud-boys #toilet #science

Well, my wife and I were married in a toilet - it was a marriage of convenience! ↗

— Tommy Cooper

#i #marriage #married #toilet #well

You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it's some weird coloured embossed stuff. ↗

— Don Van Vliet

#any #coloured #go #house #how

The main part of the house is a deep red and I have butterscotch carpet. And I have a bathroom with leopard skin floor, wallpaper and toilet. ↗

— Macy Gray

#carpet #deep #floor #house #i