#u

I'm not saying he was, like, crying tears of man pain over the phone, but he sounded upset. ↗

— Hannah Harrington

#humor #humour #funny

But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armorers had made a new gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armor. It was gilt by association. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #politics #funny

History is an endless repetition of the element of surprise. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#history #humor #funny

Portrait: a painted picture expressing less words than a photograph, and hence more accurate. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #language #pictures #funny

It is impossible to persuade a man who does not disagree, but smiles. ↗

— Muriel Spark

#disagree #does #impossible #man #persuade

Connie, have you been trying to call me?" No Archie. "Well, my phone has not been ringing all day, and I thought it might have been you. ↗

— Lawrence Sanders

#humor

I have tried sex with both men and women. I found I liked it. ↗

— Dusty Springfield

#found #i #liked #men #men and women

As I, my real self, grew older, I entered more and more into the substance of my dreams. One may dream, and even in the midst of the dream be aware that he is dreaming, and if the dream be bad, comfort himself with the thought that it is only a dream. This is a common experience with all of us. And so it was that I, the modern, often entered into my dreaming, and in the consequent strange dual personality was both actor and spectator. And right often have I, the modern, been perturbed and vexed by the foolishness, illogic, obtuseness, and general all-round stupendous stupidity of myself, the primitive. ↗

— Jack London

#duality #foolishness #modern #primitive #self

One thing my wife says is bad about me, is that I still care too much. ↗

— Aaron Spelling

#bad #care #i #me #much

I don't believe in singing lessons. You can sing or you can't. ↗

— Harry Dean Stanton

#i #lessons #sing #singing #singing lessons